Police Officers Wife

As I sat on my couch tonight reading a newly released book about being a police officers wife I found myself lost in its pages, ignoring the screams of my children (it's okay they were all tucked in and were just protesting about bedtime) and starting to feel very heavy hearted. Many of the things in this book rang true to my own life and I started to feel very depressed and sorry for myself. It's true that it's not easy being married to a police officer. There are many days [and weeks] that I feel like a single parent or that Erik is cheating on me with his Sgt (a good MALE friend of his) because of all the phone calls/texts at all hours of the day/night. I get frustrated at the ruined plans because Daddy had to go into work early or on his day off. I hate having to explain to J that she needs to be quiet or play outside so Daddy can sleep because he got home really late. It hurts when I hear of an activity that I wasn't invited to because the person in charge figured I wouldn't be able to come anyway since Erik had to work. But you know what, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I enjoy seeing the joy in Erik's face when he talks about his job, I live for the excitement in J's eyes when she sees the flashing lights on her Daddy's police car or hears him talk to her over the car's radio. I enjoy being able to go places as a family on his days off (in the middle of the week) and not having to deal with crowds. But mostly, I love the peace that the gospel brings into our lives. I know that every day that Erik goes out to work his life is in danger and I know that if something bad goes down he'll be there runnin' and gunnin' with the rest of them (and probably first in line). For these reasons I don't like his job (and he knows it) but I don't find myself waking up each day wondering if this is going to be our last. The book I was reading gave me the impression that many police officer's wives live their lives wondering if today will be the last with their loved one. I couldn't/can't live like that. I am so grateful for the peace the gospel brings. As I sit on my couch night after night waiting to hear the garage door open I never know if today will be the last, but I do know that if it is the last it is only the last here on earth and that I will get to see him again. I don't know what Heavenly Father has in store for our family but I do know that he hears and answers prayers and the pleads of a 4 year old girl that her "Daddy wont be ran over or shot " do not go unheard (the ran over part isn't random, several of the most recent officers to die here in Houston have been ran over by drunk drivers). So every day I tell my police officer that I love him and send him out the door with a prayer in my heart and faith that a loving Heavenly Father will watch over and keep him safe and help us get through whatever troubles may arise. I love the peace the gospel brings and can't imagine living this life without it!